recreation

I hiked Mt. Si today! I made it to the top. I didn't scramble up the Haystack. I took one look at that and said OH HELL NO! Breanna did it and I admit the view is amazing. I might try for the Haystack the next time. But I figure for my first big test, 4000 feet over 4 miles is just fine.

Coming down the mountain was also brutal. But I did it! The last quarter-mile both going up and coming down was sheer force of will. But see, that's just it! Before, I would have given up long before the top. In fact, the last time I attempted this hike, I quit before I even reached the half-way point.

I think alot of it has to do with my attitude. I'm finding myself much more goal-oriented. And I am much more in tune with my body and am able to make it work for me. I am liking the challenge of testing my strength, of going beyond my limits.

On another note, I have been researching surgeons, even though I know I am ridiculously new in my process. So far, I think Dr. Brownstein is my choice for top surgery. I have seen his work and he really is an artist. As far as bottom surgery goes, if I choose to have it, I'd like to see either Dr. Raphael in Plano TX or Dr. Bowers in Colorado. Dr. Raphael has developed a technique that can provide added girth to the neophallus. And I've heard that Dr. Bowers is currently researching another method that I may be interested in.

The problem with "bottom" surgery is that the cost is outrageous and the results are less than ideal. With a metoidioplasty, the new phallus is much too small for intercourse but generally large enough to pee while standing. A phalloplasty has a much higher chance of complications and while the size can be that of the average bio-male's penis, sensation is quite limited. Another option is to just get a good prosthetic. I still wouldn't be able to pee while standing but it is much cheaper overall. his is one area that I will no doubt be exploring for quite some time.